Realization of my own perspective…

Finally! I’ve gotten down to the root core of my recurring habits. Trust. This value has played a big part in the past couple years. More importantly self-trust and self-worth. One event specifically was when my father left my mom, along with my brother and I to the Philippines to pursue a different course of action. Plain and simple he left for another lady, twice in one year. Another event was when my girlfriend of 5 years decided our relationship was unhealthy, I obviously thought different. All this, within the course of a year and a half. So I started shifting my problems and blame on other people, totally disregarding the fact that I had power to change my own mind about what I THOUGHT had happened. Which in turn made me fall into a path of self-destructive habits, only reinforcing what I believed to be true, that I’m not worthy of any love in this world. Until about a few days ago and with the FC102: Perspective class today, I realized that the reason why I kept reinforcing my habits was because I hadn’t accepted the truth of what happened. That my girlfriend left because she wasn’t happy, and that my dad did the same. It wasn’t me, or my mom, or my brother. It was their issue that they needed to deal with, in their own time, and in their own heart. And I finally accepted that, along with it comes liberation from a longing for something/someone. I finally have come into terms with what happened and that what I do now creates me. Not my past and more importantly not even my future. It’s what I do now that defines me. And now, I can finally trust myself in doing the right thing.

“It is not our talents that define us, it’s our choices.”

it has been a while…

It’s been a while since I posted here. I’ve been concentrating on Ground Influence quite a bit. that may actually be more of the official blog than this one since Ground Influence is getting way more views and getting hits by search engines like google. So I may come back to this, we’ll see. But for now… off to work.

The Tortoise And The Hare

Once upon a time there was a hare who, boasting how he could run faster than anyone else, was forever teasing tortoise for its slowness. Then one day, the irate tortoise answered back: “Who do you think you are? There’s no denying you’re swift, but even you can be beaten!” The hare squealed with laughter.
“Beaten in a race? By whom? Not you, surely! I bet there’s nobody in the world that can win against me, I’m so speedy. Now, why don’t you try?”
Annoyed by such bragging, the tortoise accepted the challenge. A course was planned, and the next day at dawn they stood at the starting line. The hare yawned sleepily as the meek tortoise trudged slowly off. When the hare saw how painfully slow his rival was, he decided, half asleep on his feet, to have a quick nap. “Take your time!” he said. “I’ll have forty winks and catch up with you in a minute.”
The hare woke with a start from a fitful sleep and gazed round, looking for the tortoise. But the creature was only a short distance away, having barely covered a third of the course. Breathing a sigh of relief, the hare decided he might as well have breakfast too, and off he went to munch some cabbages he had noticed in a nearby field. But the heavy meal and the hot sun made his eyelids droop. With a careless glance at the tortoise, now halfway along the course, he decided to have another snooze before flashing past the winning post. And smiling at the thought of the look on the tortoise’s face when it saw the hare speed by, he fell fast asleep and was soon snoring happily. The sun started to sink, below the horizon, and the tortoise, who had been plodding towards the winning post since morning, was scarcely a yard from the finish. At that very point, the hare woke with a jolt. He could see the tortoise a speck in the distance and away he dashed. He leaped and bounded at a great rate, his tongue lolling, and gasping for breath. Just a little more and he’d be first at the finish. But the hare’s last leap was just too late, for the tortoise had beaten him to the winning post. Poor hare! Tired and in disgrace, he slumped down beside the tortoise who was silently smiling at him.
“Slowly does it every time!” he said.
-Aesop’s Fable

This is a very good way to look at procrastination vs. action. Slow steady progress. Something I’ve had to learn myself many times over. I’m still having a hard time adjusting from ICA being a hobby instead of school, but it certainly feels like a hobby. It definitely beats the way I used to look at things. It certainly does make a difference to look at it as a life long hobby. I used to think that after one fix it would be over. And I’d finally be happy. Boy was I wrong. Patience is a very grand virtue to learn for us twenty-somethings.

Ground Influence: “The Daily Dose of Influence”

Okay so instead of mixing up the blogs I’m making a separate one called: Ground Influence: “The Daily Dose of Influence”

This blog will have ‘daily influence’ quotes from the book I’m reading at the moment. As well as some reflections and maybe some simple 10 minute activities I can think of to do during the day. This is for anyone wanting to follow along on a journey to progress improvement drastically, as a coach and as a person. Check it out now to see what it’s all about. Peace!

Habitual Patterns… FOILED!!

So I’ve had a lot of time to think during this 2 week break period from ICA. I’ve fallen back to old patterns and I don’t like it! Not one bit. I feel that it’s creating a backward motion from the ongoing momentum forward I had already created. So slowly and slowly it’ll come to a complete stop and this starts all over again. I want to get out of this lazy rut I’m in and make dynamic leaps, and earth-shattering improvement on my coaching.

So since I’ve been lazy for the past week and a half… I’m making a commitment to all who read this blog what one thing  I learn everyday that will add to the quality of your life. I’ll be reading at least one book in a week, with notes. At least 4 hours a day MUST be devoted to that. Whether it be ICA, Business Books, Coaching Books, but one book a week or more with notes.

No more playing around with the 98% of people I know, but time for some serious action and ownage on the 2% that are making strides. Time to move because the trains fast approaching.

Reflection: “MOTIVATION COMES FROM WHAT YOU DO”

The Dip by Seth Godin

I finished The Dip by Seth Godin. It was an amazingly short read packed with loads of information on “quitting smart”. I used to find myself as an avid quitter of things. And though many of my peers saw me as someone who couldn’t finish one thing he started, this book really changed my perspective. Though I had felt a bit of low self-esteem because of what my peers thought, I realize that I quit for the smart reasons. I’m in love with the work I’m doing now. If anyone has anytime to read this book, I suggest it highly. Especially since there’s so much information in the world that even just figuring out when to quit, or even if you should quit, is even the right thing for you. The Dip is the equivalent to the long slog between hard work and success. One of the gems in this book mentions scarcity in the marketplace. Scarcity only forms when the solo-preneurs, the people who are masters at their craft, or even the tennis player who’s played for 19 years not amounting to much but a few awards, decide to become #1. The people on top are the people who are valued because of their Dip. The Dip is the testing ground of whether the project or task you’re going for is even worth the effort. The people that lean into the Dip and push through are the ones that develop scarcity in the marketplace.

Quitting is a good thing if you know the effort you put in isn’t worth it.

My problem is procrastinating…. I have to figure that one out…

MAPP: Authentic Happiness Martin Seligman

So as I was browsing through the ICA website this morning I came across a post about the University of Pennsylvania and how they’ve added a Masters of Applied Positive Psychology or (MAPP) as they like to call it.

Dr. Martin Seligman is the Director/Founder of the program. After reading through and learning all about what this program is I took a few surveys as they needed a participants to take part in they’re on-going research. I’d be interested to see what unfolds. Some questions really hit home as to things I need to change about myself, and for myself. I want to see how the program develops. If it goes well, I may work double-time to get my butt back to school. A decision that needs more planning.

On another note I ordered Beck and Cowan’s work on “Spiral Dynamics”, which is a branch off the work of Clare W. Graves’ work “The Levels of Human Existence”. I can’t wait to read it, as I want to implement that knowledge into my clients.

As far as finding my niche, I want to help the 20-somethings. I ran into a book today called the “20 Something Manifesto” by Christine Hassler, seems like people need help finding their passions AND they’re young! There’s a whole new slew of kids growing up wanting something other than what society believes to be right for them. The world isn’t so linear anymore, the world is a squiggly mess that needs some fixing, but that’s a different blog all together. =)

Basically we’re all starting from the same boat, we just have to put the pieces back together. Our lives are so filled with ‘noise’ that we have a very difficult time quieting down and really listening. And that’s 80% the solution for the 20-somethings out there. But it’s time for bed. And this 20-something deal is something I’m going to have to research on… head start on that research paper… you know? hehe. good night ya’ll.

As I move on…

So I haven’t started my coaching assignment yet. I’m slacking and I know it. I’m going back to my old ways which isn’t a good thing. I have to learn to balance all this. AND I must sacrifice a few things that feel good but aren’t important. I must sacrifice some pleasures for long term pleasure. I must…

My Exploratory Session….

Had the first explore session with my coach today. Very great advice.

1. Land
2. Research
3. Brainstorm

I think this coach will be a great fit too. It seems like we have a lot in common. Including NLP and Tony Robbins. She’s very direct and to the point. Which is something I need sometimes. Very personable. Hmm… I wonder if it had anything to do with NLP. I could learn a lot from Luann. I’m happy. I’m in it 100%.

As far as ICA goes I’m on break for the next 2 weeks. So I have to spend time figuring out my schedule for when I start back up again. I guess it would be a good time to read through my material for school. I have to declutter all my clutter as well. And really just focus on coaching for right now. No more getting distracted with books of other kind. Well, off to research the book club.

it’s time for a timeline

Okay so last week I finally enrolled into ICA. While it was a bit overwhelming to figure things out, I managed to attend and participate in 2 classes. AC105 [Creating Action 1] and FC105 [Getting Started 1]. I have to say I’m enjoying the quality of ICA. This is a very in-depth training organization. Now that I have some free time coming up during our break I’m going to set a schedule for myself. A timeline so to speak on when to graduate. So here’s my plan. I want to graduate by December of 2008, which gives me about 6 months to finish. So I have to work double time and make sure I’m getting the best out of my trainings.

Main Goal: To graduate from ICA by December 2008
Why: So I can fulfill my dream of being a life coach by the end of this year. So I can accelerate my learning process and start my coaching practice. So I can effectively help others find and LIVE their life’s purpose. Because this is worth it for me. Because I want to make a difference in humanity. It’s time to use S.M.A.R.T.

Specific
Measurable
Attainable
Relevant
Time-based

Timeline (taken from class outlines for the CPCP Program):

FC100: Foundation Coach

• FC101 What is Coaching?
  • Reference Documents
    • Identifying my Niche
    • The Ideal Coach Worksheet
    • ICA Class Log
  • Teleclass: What is Coaching? Part I [Fri. July 18, 2008 4-5p EST]
  • Teleclass: What is Coaching? Part II [Fri. July 25, 2008 4-5p EST]
• FC102 Perspective
  • Reference Documents
    • Twenty Powerful Perspectives
  • Teleclass: Perspective: It’s all in how you look at Part I [Wed. July 16, 2008 9-10p EST]
  • Teleclass: Perspective: It’s all in how you look at Part II [Mon. July 17, 2008 7-8a EST]
• FC103 Effective Feedback
  • Teleclass: Effective Feedback: Using compassion & truth for powerful coaching results Part I [Thu. July 24, 2008 7-8a EST]
  • Teleclass: Effective Feedback: Using compassion & truth for powerful coaching results Part II [Thu. July 31, 2008 7-8a EST]
• FC105 Getting Started
  • Reference Documents
    • Design Your Life Program
    • Sample Client Scenarios
    • Top Ten Tips for Pro Bono Coaching
    • Practice Design Form
    • ICA Coaching Manifesto Discovery Form
    • Individual Development Form
    • ICF Code of Ethics
  • Teleclass: Getting Started: Starting your coaching practice Part I [Sun. July 20, 2008 4-5p EST]
  • Teleclass: Getting Started: Starting your coaching practice Part II [Sun. July 27, 2008 4-5p EST]
• FC106 Trial Session
  • Reference Documents
    • Example 1 – ECA – Welcome Pack
  • Teleclass: Trial Session: Getting clients Part I [Wed. July 16, 2008 6-7a EST]
  • Teleclass: Trial Session: Getting clients Part II [Wed. July 23, 2008 6-7a EST]
• FC107 Power Listening
  • Reference Documents
    • Listening Quiz
  • Teleclass: Power listening: The key to hearing it all Part I [Mon. July 21, 2008 7-8a EST]
  • Teleclass: Power listening: The key to hearing it all Part II [Mon. July 28, 2008 7-8a EST]

AC100: Advanced Coach I

• AC101 Acknowledgment
  • Teleclass: Acknowledgment Part I [Thu. July 17, 2008 6-7p EST]
  • Teleclass: Acknowledgment Part II [Thu. July 24, 2008 6-7p EST]
• AC102 Enthusing
  • Teleclass: Enthusing Part I [Thu. July 31, 2008 6-7p EST]
  • Teleclass: Enthusing Part II [Thu. Aug 7, 2008 6-7p EST]
• AC103 Creating Structure
  • Teleclass: Creating structure Part I [Thu. Aug 14, 2008 6-7p EST]
  • Teleclass: Creating structure Part II [Thu. Aug 21, 2008 6-7p EST]
• AC104 Goal Setting
  • Reference Documents
    • The Values Game
    • Create a Prosperity Board
    • Next Quarter Goals
    • ICA Exercise Arrow Action Plan
  • Teleclass: Goal Setting Part I [Thu. July 17, 2008 9-10p EST]
  • Teleclass: Goal Setting Part II [Thu. July 24, 2008 9-10p EST]
• AC105 Creating Action
  • Teleclass: Creating Action Part I [Tue. June 24, 2008 7-8a EST]
  • Teleclass: Creating Action Part II [Tue. July 15, 2008 6-7a EST]
• AC106 Peer Coaching
  • Reference Documents
    • Client Response to Coaching Form
    • Graduate Assessment: Research Paper
    • Example Research Paper
  • Teleclass: Peer Coaching- Setting up your student coaching relationship Part I [Tue. July 22, 2008 6-7a EST]
  • Teleclass: Peer Coaching- Setting up your student coaching relationship Part II [Wed. July 23, 2008 8-9p EST]
  • Teleclass: Peer Coaching- Setting up your student coaching relationship Part III [Mon. July 28, 2008 9-10p EST]
  • Teleclass: Peer Coaching- Setting up your student coaching relationship Part IV [Mon. July 28, 2008 4-5p EST]
• AC107 Coaching Model
  • Teleclass: Coaching Model Part I [Tue. July 29, 2008 6-7a EST]
  • Teleclass: Coaching Model Part II [Tue. Aug 5, 2008 6-7a EST]
  • Teleclass: Coaching Model Part III [Tue. Aug 12, 2008 6-7a EST]
• AC108 Coaching Process
  • Teleclass: Coaching Process Part I [Mon. July 28, 2008 1-2p EST]
  • Teleclass: Coaching Process Part II [Mon. Aug 4, 2008 1-2p EST]
  • Teleclass: Coaching Process Part III [Mon. Aug 11, 2008 1-2p EST]
  • Teleclass: Coaching Process Part IV [Mon. Aug 18, 2008 1-2p EST]
• AC109 Confidence
  • Teleclass: Confidence Part I [Sun. July 13, 2008 7-8p EST]
  • Teleclass: Confidence Part II [Sun. July 20, 2008 7-8p EST]
  • Teleclass: Confidence Part III [Sun. July 27, 2008 7-8p EST]

• AC110 Challenging Clients
  • Teleclass: Challenging clients Part I [Thu. July 24, 2008 1-2p EST]
  • Teleclass: Challenging clients Part II [Thu. July 31, 2008 1-2p EST]
• AC111 Underlying Automatic Commitments
  • Reference Documents
    • Discover Your UAC
  • Teleclass: Underlying Automatic Commitments Part I [Tue. July 22, 2008 8-9p EST]
  • Teleclass: Underlying Automatic Commitments Part II [Tue. July 29, 2008 8-9p EST]
  • Teleclass: Underlying Automatic Commitments Part III [Tue. Aug 5, 2008 8-9p EST]
• AC112 Powerful Requests
  • Teleclass: Making powerful requests Part I [Mon. July 21, 2008 6-7a EST]
  • Teleclass: Making powerful requests Part II [Mon. July 28, 2008 6-7a EST]
• AC113 Practical Ethics and Legalities
  • Practical [Mon. July 21, 2008 9-10p EST]